Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Discarded Divas

So, I went to a wedding the other day, and I watched as the geriatric father of the bride pranced around with his sullen, young second wife, whilst the still single, fabulous looking mother of the bride, pranced around with her best friend, no male escort in sight. She was a beautiful, tall, stately woman, obviously in her prime. I could recount the story of how Pops left her years ago for the young hussy, but, I will not bother. You get the gist.

This then got me to thinking about the number of women that are in the Diva's particular position. Women, who have built lives with men like Pops from the ground up, elevate these men to their current status, and at the end of the day, are cast aside when they get a little bit of rust on their mufflers. My mother also falls into what I call the “Discarded Diva” category.

This adds a new element to the so-called dating scene in the Cayman Islands, for, if you break down the dynamics, men of the same age and stature as the Discarded Divas are either related, married; separated; divorcing, or are just like Pops, and looking for a newer rust-free model. The men that are 'available' may also come with a cargo load of baggage that no sane human should ever claim. Should a Discarded Diva turn a blind eye to these matters, strictly to find someone with whom to grow old, regardless of the stress and strife that they may bring into the Diva's life? Me thinkest not!

Another option for the Discarded Divas would be to pull a Demi / Ashton scenario, but, alas, exactly how is this conceivable? Personally, I, my brothers and sisters would have a fit should some young stalwart stallion attempt to court our fabulous matriarch. Visions of disease, money grubbing and other Lifetime network movie-ending nefarious scenarios would soil any romanticised notions of a happily n-ever after.

And then, there is the social scene for these Divas, or lack thereof. I, personally, have lamented in the past about feeling old in the club, and the Islands' social scene in general, so exactly how would the Discarded Divas feel? It is just not feasible for a Discarded Diva to prance around in the club, going down low-low-low and showing her “Apple Bottom Jeans”. The whole club would be looking at her all right, then I would be barraged with hundreds of text messages regaling me with how mi mudda brukkin' out in the club. Lawd, mi heart jus' doh beat right when mi t'ink 'bout the notion.
That just nah right, on any level.

Previous attempts on the island to establish ‘mature’ clubs have been unsuccessful, for the Discarded Divas do not stay out until all hours, nor do they drink themselves into the ground in order to allow a club owner to make a profit, and to keep their establishments thriving. Eventually, profitability being the key, the age requirement is always lifted to grant entrance to the young, nubile ‘gents’ and ‘ladies’.

Not everything has a happy ending, like the First Wives Club, so, I ponder, where exactly does this leave the Discarded Divas? To stay home and mull about as my Discarded Diva currently does?

On that contemplative note, I shall now exit.

Ta ta...




Jdid said...

there's always eHarmony

Abeni said...

Even eharmony fails:)

Bingo nights?

Stunner said...

Well, if eHarmony and Bingo nights fail, then there is always "rent-A-Dread"!!!

Mad Bull said...

I vote for the Ashton - Demi type relationship. Let her enjoy herself. Oonoo have your own life to live, let Mom live hers too.
She could find a poorer older man too... if he can't sponsor the new bimma with the shiny mufflers, he will have to make do with an older model...

Mighty Afroditee said...

1. Mi mudda doh know how fi use a 'puta, that rules out the eharmony scenario.

2. The 'oman dem look fabulous, and ya'll relagating them to Bingo? I thinketh not!

3. Stunner: Rent a dread??? I see that you are setting mi mudda up f ketch an STD.

Mighty Afroditee said...

4. 'Beni: How do you know that eHarmony fails??? Did'ja try it??? Enquiring minds wanna know!

5. Mad Bull - yeah, we want her to have her own life, but right now...sigh...difficult to let go. Now, mi mudda almost like mi chil', and I feel so overprotective.

Abeni said...

Girl,tried it for fun...needless to say I had no