I was waiting patiently for the arrival of my food at a local restaurant, when two ladies entered and proceeded to vociferously greet each other.
I initially marveled at their sense of sisterhood, then proceeded to eavesdrop shamelessly on their somewhat bawdy (and shamelessy loud) conversation.
Sissy, is weh yu' did deh?
Misses…recession lick me!
Yu' lie! Wha’pen to Peetah?
Bloodclaat….‘im lose ‘im wuk and gaan back a ‘im wife, an' fi ‘ar pum-pum nah sweet like fi mi!
Lawd, sah. A wah yu a go do now?
[Sighs] Mi nevah ‘affi do nuttin’ wen ‘im did deh-deh, now, cho! mi nah know sah!
Yu a go look wuk?
[Heaves in righteous indignation] No sah! Mi affi go fin’ nadda boops! Dat deh wuk a' fi mi wuk!
[Bawdy laughter. Back slapping. Gold teeth and tonsils flash from both parties]
It ruff sah…but wid fi yu sweet pum-pum, it nah go tek long!
[Laughter continues...parties exit...crickets chirp as restaurant occupants recover from the dialogue]
I was scintillated. So many questions: What was the yard stick used for Sissy’s measurement of the sweetness of her pum-pum, and how did her friend know to be able to comment on said sweetness? Is the sweetness a well known fact, or was she just being a supportive friend? Did Sissy have a set methodology to find a new boops? Was her pum-pum her CV? Would she register as unemployed with the Employment Relations Office? What were Sissy's boops benefits and for what period were they terminated? Was she on a work permit? Why would Peetah’s wife take him back? Could Petah's wife now effectively be called his ‘boops’ as he in turn recovered from the economic downturn???
The wenches shamelessly tossed out little scintillating facts, and jus’ leave people hanging!
An on that disgruntled note, I shall now exit.